Entries tagged with parenting

Current Mood: aggravated
Crossposts: https://grammarwoman.livejournal.com/208314.html

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Worst mother trophy awarded, news at 11

All y'all can go home, I'm the worst mom.

The school closure for today was announced yesterday on account of the "welcome to -40F windchill" predictions, and I informed the kid that he would be going to bed at his usual school night time anyway. "But Mom!" I didn't even bother arguing with him; I just pulled out the bare bones "Guess what - I'm your mom and sometimes I get to say Because I Said So, and you have to live with it."

I got another robocall this afternoon announcing that school is out tomorrow as well, and I informed Mr. Luckypants of the news, and that his bedtime would not change. I guess he didn't believe me, because when I reminded him just now, I'm surprised his outraged shriek of "WHAT" didn't set the neighborhood dogs barking. "Maybe if you had worked on your homework at all, I might have let you stay up later, but now you have only tomorrow to work on the assignments," said the meanest mom. The sullen "FINE" I got was straight out of a John Hughes movie: epic in scope and timbre, throbbing with the injustice of it all.

OK, maybe I'm a teeny bit resentful that I'm the only one working in this household. Oh, yeah, forgot to mention - the husband got laid off a week ago Friday, and hasn't done a damned thing to sign up for unemployment or job search. Gosh, I was really looking forward to being a single income family again. NOT.

Temps be damned - tomorrow I think I'm gonna go for a walk outside.

Crossposts: http://grammarwoman.livejournal.com/190074.html

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Parenting by Hamilton

The Emperor was messing around in the bathroom instead of following the nightly routine, so without thinking I called to him "Talk less, brush more!"

Current Mood: depressed
Crossposts: http://grammarwoman.livejournal.com/159869.html

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How to ruin an afternoon in two emails

A week ago, the Emperor woke up early with a horrible cough, but he assured me that he could handle school. The school nurse called me a couple of hours later with the news that he had a 100.8 degree fever, and that I needed to take him home. I'm very lucky that my boss is flexible and my laptop is portable, so I worked from home the next couple of days as he recovered from the fever/coughing/tummy bug that laid him low.

However, returning to school after a five day binge on TV and videogames did nothing for his social skills success; he cried most of the way home when I told him that not meeting his goal still meant no privileges. He was tired out of his gourd and hotly denying it, too. (Kid, I've been your mom for your whole life; I know what you sound like when you're tired.) I didn't even rub it in when he fell asleep buried in his couch cushion cocoon ten minutes after getting home.

Yesterday he was very proud of himself to have made his goal. I was glad to hear that he was back on track.

Then today I got an email from the teacher informing me that he's leaving important work in his desk instead of bringing it home, and he's still being disruptive in class and is falling behind other kids because he can't pay attention the first or second time something is explained. As I was composing a reply to that letter, another email from the teacher showed up, this time letting me know that he hadn't bothered working on the class holiday craft, so he wouldn't have that to share with us.

I guess I haven't been keeping an eye on my "CAN" levels, because that second email literally reduced me to tears. I feel like such a shitty parent when I've got nothing left to tell the teacher about how to handle my son. I don't even know if ADHD medication would help at this point, considering that he throws up any pills other than his multivitamin.

I know part of my over-reaction is the looming menace of my period, but goddamn, I'm feeling really low right now.

Current Mood: thoughtful
Crossposts: http://grammarwoman.livejournal.com/159581.html

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Five questions meme

kass asked me five questions. The questions and my answers are below the cut.

If you want me to ask you five questions, leave a comment and I will do so. Then you get to post your answers in your journal along with this same explanation.

Onward! Warning: this got wordy. Really wordy.

( 1) What crafty project are you proudest of? )

( 2) What fandom is making you happiest right now, and what is it about the fandom / characters / whatever that speaks to you? )

( 3) What have you learned about life, the universe, and everything through becoming a mom? )

( 4) If you could go anywhere in the world for a week, all expenses paid, where would you go and what would you do there? )

( 5) If you were hosting a dream dinner party (or coffee klatsch or roleplaying gathering or whatever) and could invite any five people from any fictional sources, who would you invite to join you at your table? )

Thank you for the questions,

kass! Sorry if I TL;DRed the heck out of it.

Current Mood: drained
Crossposts: http://grammarwoman.livejournal.com/156746.html

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That's Monday for you

Every so often, I get asked to do some SQL retrieval or consult on a project I worked on before I moved to web development. Today was a host of item updates that I wrote up using Excel and my own formatting program. It's awesome to temporarily feel qualified to do my job. *sigh*

Not so awesome was another conference at the Emperor's school, this time around with the new teacher. She seems suited for the job, having lots of teaching experience, but not any with the micro society and leadership program that is the focus of the school. We found out that our enterprising capitalist has been selling his snacks for the micro currency, then turning around and buying temporary friends during recess so they'll let him play with them.

The teacher had to get me a box of tissues for that one. I'm still tearing up thinking about it.

About the only change that has been truly worth moving to this new school is the academic challenge of his new class. Everything else has left me feeling like we made the wrong choice.

I know that the rush of emotions is due in no small part to not getting enough sleep and being midway through my period. Which means I should go to bed.

G'night.

Current Mood: contemplative
Crossposts: http://grammarwoman.livejournal.com/122544.html

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Imperial parenting

Sometimes I high-five myself for doing such a good job raising the Emperor, and other times I feel grossly under-qualified.

For example: a couple of weeks ago at pickup, one of his preschool teachers recapped an incident from that day. The Emperor and a friend of his were holding hands in line, and the other little boy said to my son, "I love you! Let's get married." To which the Emperor replied, "We'd have to move to a different country. Illinois doesn't let two boys get married." I was so gleefully gobsmacked at this that I totally failed to get a read on the teacher, if she was amused, amazed, or scandalized. I was just happy that he both took the proclamation of love in stride and remembered the one dinner conversation we'd had on the subject months ago.

It's amazing what sticks. It's so refreshing when it's information like that and not inappropriate Futurama quotes. (Like when the husband wore his Bender T-shirt yesterday that proclaims "Bite my shiny metal ass!" and the Emperor read it out loud at the dinner table, asking if that was correct.) His teacher told him that he shouldn't watch Futurama because it's an adult show. The way I figure it, at least he's not watching "reality" shows and hopelessly confused about fact versus fiction.

Playing with Legos the other day, he asked me if the universe has a floor. I stumbled my way through a response for that. I don't know that that question would have even occurred to me at five, let alone that I would have asked it.

His current favorite thing ever is Rescue Heroes, a donation from the son of a coworker. I have to say, the cartoons are pretty good; they pass the Bechdel test, they have multiple POC and women as the heroes, and there are no villains, just accidents and bad weather. Plus, the theme has a kicky techno beat.

He's getting so independent, too! He insists on brushing his teeth all by himself, and washes himself at bath-time, only letting me scrub his back. He gets dressed independently most mornings, and lets me sleep in on the weekends as long as I get him breakfast and something to watch on TV.

On a more distressing front, though, the Emperor's started saying on a regular basis how much he hates life, and how he can't wait until he and/or everything is dead, because life is so hard. Usually 10 minutes later he'll be laughing at something, so it's not like he's moping around all the time, but I really have no idea what to do about it. Is this a phase that will pass? Should I be rushing him to a therapist? Will kindergarten distract/entertain him enough that he won't feel that way anymore?

As it is, I'm worrying way too much about kindergarten and it doesn't even start for a couple of weeks. When I registered him a couple of days ago, the teacher was hawking a LeapFrog alphabet DVD. I told her that he didn't need it as he's already reading. Plus, she was surprised when I asked about gifted testing. Even though it's on the school website as being available for grades K-6, apparently they don't pull kids for the special classes until 2nd grade. My husband and I both have a bad history of being bored underachievers in school; I don't want that for him. What I need to do is find out from my dad what the magic words are to use with a teacher that fosters a "let's work on this together" attitude and not the "I'm a difficult, crackpot parent who thinks you suck" one.

Woo, Friday! We had way too much fun at the in-laws the past couple of weekends (bounce house AND swimming), so I'm looking forward to a low-key time at home, though I think the Emperor is going to be disappointed. If we could get some tolerable weather for working outside, that would be sweet as well.

Current Mood: thoughtful
Crossposts: http://grammarwoman.livejournal.com/120961.html

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Win some, lose some, think lots

OMG, guys, my Farscape vid won an online award! Granted, it's only a round 1 win, and the other vid I'm up against for round 2 will blow me out of the water, but still!

I submitted it on a lark, and it wasn't until

sabaceanbabe posted about the voting that I remembered. Even though round 1 is done, you can still vote for Viewer's Choice and such, so go vote for me and

sabaceanbabe and all the other righteous vidders on that list!

In other news, I totally failed as a parent this week. The Emperor has been watching Futurama again, and we blazed through to Jurassic Bark. We got to the end of the episode, and I went upstairs to get dressed. The next thing I knew, a sobbing Emperor threw himself at me; he was upset for the next half hour, all the way though being dropped off at daycare. (I don't think the teacher approved of us letting him watch an adult show like that.) I should have just skipped it. Man, I felt like crap after that, on top of being sad myself at the ending. :(

The Emperor is shaping up to be quite the philosopher. Today he informed me that we're all a part of "God's big dream", and unlike all the other garbled religious stories he tells us about, this one came entirely out of his own head. Now if only I could break him of his distressing insistence that he wishes that everything was dead, because sometimes he hates being alive.

Right now, I've got Muse's concert video on in the background. I have to laugh at myself; I keep hearing songs and thinking "I love that song! I didn't know they did that one!" You'd think I'd have clued into their distinctive sound by now...

Happy weekend, everyone!

Current Mood: enthralled

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Proud mommy is PROUD

Guys! OMG GUYS! The Emperor is an author. He wrote a book in daycare, drawing the pictures himself and dictating the text to his teachers, who are in utter awe - "None of the kids have written a book before!"

It's three folded-up pages, bound together by tape and pure AWESOMESAUCE.

( Allow me to present this exciting new work )

*FLAILS* My son! He's so amazing! Pardon me while I go wipe away the gleeful mommy sniffles and try not explode from pride.

Current Mood: drained

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The verdict is in

I am completely useless for work today. The most productive thing I've done is answer questions on a program that uses a procedure of which I am the reigning department champion. (Fortran ODBC calls to SQL Server – whee!) However, I've done a bunch of personal clean-up tasks that each took up ten minutes or less of brainpower. FSA paperwork, emails returned, library accounts cleaned up…anything to look busy.

I am tired, again, some more. I was supposed to be able to sleep in a bit this morning, as the conference at the Emperor's daycare was at 9 AM, a full 45 minutes later than I usually drop him off. However, the Emperor declared that he was "done sleeping" even earlier than usual, so my own snoozefest was more like a series of interrupted five-minute naps. Bleargh.

So the conference…It would have been much easier if I could have just continued to cast his teachers as the bad guys. But no, they have to be all sympathetic and understanding and supportive and nurturing. It was a sit-down with both teachers and the head of the pre-school section of daycare, whose name I didn't even catch. (Strike one against me.) She proceeded to give me the good news/bad news reasons for the meeting.

( Good kid. Bad temper. )

So now I'm investigating reward charts and point systems and all the parental work the real world requires, that we probably should have been doing all along. Plus, I'm going to make the damned doctor appointment and hope she can give us useful advice and not just a prescription.

Wish me luck and patience, guys.