SG-1 Fic – Climbing the Walls

[grammarwoman]

Title: Climbing the Walls
Characters: Vala, Cameron
Rating: Gen
Word Count: 5000
A/N: A while back, synecdochic and ivorygates hosted a comment fic party. ivorygates wrote a delightful response to my prompt (ETA: which you should definitely read first, so this will make any sense). Before I knew it, my brain was invaded with this plot bunny. It took several months to get it all down and polished, but here it is. Many thanks to my husband who continues to be amused without condescending about my fanfic and fandom habits (when I tried to explain the whole X, Y vs X/Y gen/porn shorthand to him while griping that Vala was pushing really hard for this to be smutty, he suggested that I use a semicolon for a failed attempt at a hookup. This is why I love him.), synecdochic and ivorygates for their astounding work in the SG-1 fic universe (my admiration for them knows no bounds), and sabaceanbabe, who volunteered at the last minute to beta this and did terrifically efficient job of it. You rock.


Climbing the Walls

Vala woke the next morning feeling sated and loose as a contented cat. But then the events of the previous evening came rushing back to her, and her good mood abruptly drained away. No one was that nice without expecting something in return: “friendship” was merely shorthand for a history of mutual favors owed, and she preferred to have the favors owed to her. She utterly despised being indebted to another, and now Mitchell had something over her.

Worse yet, over the next few days, he didn’t even have the decency to acknowledge what hung between them. There were no knowing leers or weighted statements. His affable smile (his “village idiot” grin, she seethed to herself) was as guileless and open as always. She found herself revising her opinion of his canniness, never suspecting how devious he could be to sustain such a subtle campaign of intimidation. She steeled herself to wait him out.

Then five offworld missions had come and gone, and the only change in his behavior had been to ask her opinion rather more than usual, and to offer her a powerbar before she realized she was peevishly hungry. She pictured breaking his neck as she snapped the bar in half and chewed thoroughly to keep her angry retort from escaping.

Her tenuous composure lasted through the quick post-mission debriefing and out into the hallway where the team dispersed to their various tasks. Then Cam called after Vala, stooping to pick up one of her glittery barrettes and handing it back to her.

Vala promptly lost it. “I cannot take this…this waiting any longer, Mitchell! You are driving me completely insane!”

The confused look on his face (a common expression for him, she noted with grim satisfaction) only fueled her rage. “Vala, what’s got you so hopping mad? You haven’t cycled around again already, have you? I can dig up some more tea-”

“Cameron Mitchell!” she hissed, as she dragged him into a nearby storage closet. “You infuriating man! How long must you make me wait until you tell me your terms?”

“Sugar, what ‘n hell are you so steamed about?” He blinked as her grip on his arm tightened. “Ouch! You wanna ease up there?”

With a visible act of will, she pried her fingers off him one by one. “If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you are truly as bereft of clues as Sam maintains.”

“Wait a minute, Sam said I’m clueless? I hate to reckon what the other guys on the team are thinking.” His brow furrowed in a momentary flash of hurt.

“Cameron. FOCUS.” Vala jabbed her finger into his chest. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten about your Good Sumerian act, with the tea, and the blankets, and…and the FOOT RUB!” Each point was accented by another poke.

He wisely stepped out of stabbing range, as far as he could in the cramped closet. “First of all, that’s Good Samaritan, and second of all, I told you, that’s what friends do. You needed a spot of comfort and I was happy to provide that. ‘Sides, I could just hear my Momma yelling at me if I’d let you suffer without trying to help.”

Words failed her. She felt her hands shaping into fists and barely stopped herself from stamping her feet or kicking him in a childish fit of temper. “But…but….that’s not right!” she yelled.

Cameron let loose a guffaw at her petulant appearance. “Lord help me, but you look just like one of the twins the first time they found out that life’s not fair.”

“Mitchell, if you laugh at me again, I will not be held accountable for my actions!” She could feel the flush of rage warming her cheeks and concentrated on not slapping the amused expression off him.

His smile faded, and he scrubbed a hand over his face. “Look, I can see we’ve got a problem here. I’m gettin' on late for my meeting with Landry, but…Do you have some time tonight? We can meet up at my quarters, say, eight-ish?”

“I will hold you to that, Colonel Mitchell,” she snapped, and stomped away.

Cameron allowed himself a brief grin as he shook his head. “Oh, Momma, I don’t think you EVER knew there’d be days like these. Lions and tigers and aliens, oh my.”


Later in the evening, Vala was pacing in her room. She had bolted an early dinner, unable to derive any of her usual enjoyment from flirting with the servers or seeing if she could make an unsuspecting Marine blush or drop his tray when she bent over to examine the dessert selections. She wanted to leave herself enough time to get appropriately prepared for her meeting with Mitchell. At last, something she could understand: an evening invitation to a man’s domicile always meant sex, and sex was familiar currency to her. Vala was confident enough of her abilities that she knew she could walk away from their encounter with him firmly in her debt. She deliberated on which of her toys to bring, but decided that the Lieutenant Colonel was vanilla enough to be more than satisfied with the offerings of her fabulous body. To be on the safe side, though, she packed a small bottle of lube and a large handful of condoms in her purse.

She glanced over at the mirror to check the seams of her stockings. Really, the Tau’ri had the most amazing selection of clothing available; she couldn’t wait until she could convince Sam to take her to the mall again. The lingerie alone nearly made it worth it to be cooped up in the Mountain on her down time. Her favorite leather bustier displayed her cleavage to its best advantage; she had yet to meet the man (well, of those with an interest in women) that could resist the siren call of her breasts.

She checked the clock and pondered the merits of showing up late. Vala wanted Mitchell to be absolutely clear on who was in control of the evening, even if she was the one under obligation. However, the prospect of regaining her equilibrium proved too much for her patience, and she found herself in front of his door a few minutes early. With a quick check of the hallway in both directions (she was hardly averse to a public show, but this time she wanted to save the initial impact of her presence for Mitchell alone), she tried the handle of the door, finding it unlocked. She summoned up her best seductive smile, swung open the door, and posed as provocatively as she could in the doorway. “Hello, darling,” she purred. “Are you ready for me?”

Cam was seated at his desk, bent over to peer at some reports. The position of the desk, pulled away from the wall and turned around so his back wasn’t to the room, made the small quarters feel even more cramped, as most of the remaining floor space was taken up by a narrow bed and chest of drawers. He didn’t look up as he answered distractedly, “C’mon in, Vala, and pull up a chair. I’ll be all set as soon as I finish up this paperwork.”

She blinked. This was not the reaction of a man waiting for an assignation. Unless…Of course. She had underestimated Mitchell’s skills at subterfuge before; this was not a man who could afford to ravage her in plain sight. She stepped into his room, closing and locking the door behind her. Then she tossed her purse on the bed and swayed over to the desk, putting as much as she could of a feline slink into her walk without throwing out her hips. After all, she didn’t want to spoil the seduction before it even started by spraining an ankle in her four-inch heels. (The Tau’ri really were to be commended for their sartorial options.)

Vala draped herself on his desk, recalling the previous occasion that had led to her current vexing situation. “What are you working on, Cameron, that could possibly be more interesting than me?” She leaned over as if to read the form under his hand, artfully stretching out so that her impressive bosom hovered right at his line of sight.

“Gimme just another minute.” He continued scribbling, not even registering her presence on the desk.

Really, he was taking this disinterested act too far. She pursed her lips as she calculated her next move. Without taking her eyes off him, she swiped a stack of folders onto the floor. “Oh dear, how clumsy of me. Let me just get these.” She bent over, keeping a hand on the desk for balance (the high heels did come with some disadvantages) as she leisurely picked up a folder. The stance displayed her shapely legs to their greatest advantage, the seams leading all the way up to her (barely covered) bottom.

Cam even didn’t look up while muttering a brief “Thanks”.

Vala briefly debated the wisdom of throwing the folder at his head. In this game, however, losing her cool would cost her the high ground. She decided that if he was sticking to his understated approach, she would counter with a blatant attack.

“Cameron? Tell me what you think of my outfit. Does it make me look too…severe?” She braced her hands against her hips, jutting out her breasts as she posed for his inspection. She’d found that no man could resist a request for his opinion. Vala suppressed her triumphant grin, settling for a quizzical look and an arched eyebrow. (Over the years, her practice in front of mirrors had given her complete control over all her facial features. Though there was less call for it, the ability to wiggle one’s nose and ears could occasionally come in handy.)

Cam was slow to look up as he answered. “Vala, honey, I’m sure you’d look amazing in a ratty old potato sack. Hell, you’d probably start a…” He trailed off as he registered what she was wearing, starting first with her cleavage, she was pleased to note. His surprised inhale nearly made him choke. “—War. Vala, what the hell are you rigged out like that for? Gonna cut a swath through the SFs after this?”

She cocked her head to the side with a sassy grin. She’d finally gotten his attention, and now everything would go according to plan. Her plan.

“Come now, Cameron. There’s no need to pretend anymore. A meeting in your quarters at night? I admire your fortitude in waiting this long to offer. Shall we get started?”

Vala took a step towards him, intending to crawl into his lap and see just how far they could go in his desk chair. Cam, though, reacted like she was threatening him with a zat, standing up so quickly that he knocked over his seat. He backed away from her with his hands raised.

“Whoa! WHOA! Time out! I invited you here to talk!” he sputtered.

“ ‘Talk’. Oh, I understand ‘talk’.” Vala winked at him as she made little air quotes around the word. (She loved to do it to Daniel, as it could make his face turn the most adorable shade of red.)

Cam continued to back up, angling to keep the desk between them.

“No, really, Vala. Just talk. With words of a non-900-number variety! Oh, no, you don’t!” He kept circling around as she tried to catch up with him. “I think it’s safer for now if you’re over there.”

She pouted. “Darling, you’re taking this pretense much too far. What else do you require? Do you want me to beg?” She leaned forward on the desk and dropped her voice into a husky lower range. “Please, Cameron. I’ll let you do anything you want.” (After a suitable amount of foreplay, of course, not that she could imagine Colonel Mitchell possessing any fetishes far outside her range of comfort.)

She could see the offer sink into his brain, and lower, as he convulsively gulped and his eyes started to glaze. Somehow, though, he clawed his way back into control.

“NO! Vala, for the last time, I did not ask you here for sex. For God’s sake, get that through that dangerous head of yours right now, before I have to tie you up to listen to me!”

“Oooo, bondage,” she purred. “I didn’t know you had it in you.”

She could tell that he was close to completely losing his composure. She waited for him to yell or strike her. Rage was easily turned to lust; once he crossed that line past self-control, he was all hers.

It was with great shock, then, that Vala saw Cameron stride to the door, struggle with the lock, and throw it open. “Fine. Leave, Vala.”

She gaped at him. “What? But I thought –”

“Did you? Did you actually engage your brain past your own petty little schemes? Were you thinking anything other than ‘That Cameron is one dumb chucklehead. I bet I could lead him around by his dick.’?”

Vala was stunned. Cameron was plenty angry enough, but this wasn’t the passionate explosion she was expecting. This was a cold fury like she’d only seen when an offworld enemy had threatened one of his SG-1 teammates. She realized with abrupt dread that her teasing banter – in fact, her whole plan of seduction – was the worst path she could have taken. She knew she had underestimated him before, but now she saw in just how wrong a direction.

Her first urge was to run out of the room; she was in uncharted territory here, and her instincts yelled at her to escape and regroup. She hadn’t gotten where she was in life by letting her fear rule her, though, so her next reaction was to defiantly lift up her chin, ready to pridefully bluff her way out of danger. However, what came out of her mouth next surprised them both.

“I’m sorry, Cameron. You are completely correct.”

It showed how far she had pushed him that he didn’t relax his expression or defensive stance at all. “Really.”

Damn the man for not responding to her apology! She could count the number of sincere ones she’d offered in recent years on two…well, perhaps one hand. She resolutely ignored the traitorous voice in her head that pointed out that her past history of demonstrating a fast and loose acquaintance with the truth was proving a disadvantage here. (She’d had enough of voices in her head, even if they were finally just hers.)

She sighed and covered her face with her hands, trying to marshal her thoughts. With all her plans in disarray, perhaps it was time to simply be honest. Well, as honest as she could be without exposing too much of herself: the internal walls she’d built up over the years for protection (from Qetesh, from others who thought she was free for the taking) would not be breached for the appeasement of one Lieutenant Colonel. Even if he was quite deliciously attractive. And with that thought, she realized that she had been looking forward to this evening for reasons beyond the settling of her debt.

“Vala?” She was grateful for Cam’s query; it snapped her out of her reverie and back to the matter at hand.

“Cameron, would you mind if I sat down? These shoes are quite attractive, but simply murder for standing.”

Cam snorted. “I just bet they are. Does this mean you’re not going to jump me?”

“Well, not tonight. Unless you ask me very clearly and very nicely. And even then it might take some convincing. I don’t appreciate being shouted at like that.”

He bit his lip and chuckled, before turning to shut the door. “Fair enough. How about we start over? Pull up a chair.”

She bypassed the seat he was waving at and sat down on the bed. Belatedly, she realized that she might be perpetuating the (now) wrong impression and held up a hand in truce. “No offense, but sitting for any length of time in one of those chairs would hurt more than these shoes. Speaking of…” She undid the buckles of her footwear and slid them off her feet with a satisfied groan. “Much better.”

Cameron righted the chair behind his desk, but instead of sitting down there, he dragged it around so he was right in front of Vala. “Nothing like getting off on the right foot, hm?” The ironic twist to his words stung her a bit. It seemed that, his previous statement to the contrary, she had some ground to cover in order to regain his good mood.

“Cameron…” she trailed off, trying to summon the right words.

“Vala.” His carefully blank expression was no help to her. To think that she had once believed that every feeling he’d held would be reflected on his face…It would have been so much easier had the man actually been a village idiot!

“I don’t know how to do…this!” She gestured between them helplessly. Evidently it was her turn to play the dimwit.

“What, talk? I thought that’s what you’re best at. Well, one of the things, anyway.” His face was still neutral. Vala gathered that he must have been taking stoic lessons from Muscles.

“Oh, talking, yes, I can talk all day. I even won a talking contest at a fair once by doing exactly that. When I found out the prize was literally a gag, well, I snuck back later to switch with the winner’s bounty for being silent. His reward was a bag of coins. I mean, really, what’s so difficult about shutting up?”

The raised eyebrow he answered her with confirmed it; he’d been associating with Teal’c for far too long.

“Yes, well, obviously talking is not a problem for me. It’s the being honest that’s rather…difficult.”

She appreciated that he didn’t go for the obvious retort. She could tell he wanted to when he opened his mouth to reply but waited a few moments to speak.

“So, Vala, what bit of truth did you come here to lay on me, dressed like a high-dollar escort?”

She preened a little. “Do you really think I could start a war?”

“Darlin’, in that outfit you could set an igloo on fire. Drive the Dalai Lama to drink. Cause an entire monastery to recant. But you knew that already.”

“Well, it never hurts to hear that a woman’s efforts have been appreciated.”

“Did you really come here to fish for some compliments? Is that why you were so pissed at me earlier? What, was I supposed to tell you that you liked nice in your BDUs?”

“No. Well, not that I’d ever turn down a compliment, but that’s not it.” She admitted to herself that her ramblings so far (she would not call it nervous babble) had been her unconscious stalling for time, and that any longer would be unduly taxing to Cameron’s patience, not to mention damaging to her reputation as being unflappable. She took a deep breath and stated, “I don’t understand this ‘friendship’ thing.”

“We’re not talking a translation error here, are we? ‘Cause it’s a pretty basic concept.”

She glared at him. “No! I mean, why would we—How could we, as a man and a woman, be friends?”

“This is what I get for shooting down ‘When Harry Met Sally’ for movie night, isn’t it?”

“Cameron!” she snapped.

“Well,” he offered, scratching his head in thought. “Sam and I are friends.”

She scoffed. “Sam doesn’t count as a woman.”

“I’m sure she’d be real glad to hear that.”

“Well, aside from the obvious lack of anything remotely feminine in her wardrobe, I meant that she’s a soldier, first. You two can relate as fellow members of the military.”

“We’ve been friends much longer than we’ve served together.” He sighed. “So you’re telling me you’ve never just been pals with a guy?”

Vala shifted uneasily. “I’ve known lots of men.”

“Biblically, I’m sure.” Cam winced as the words came out before he could stop them. “Sorry. So what you’re telling me is that you don’t know how people of opposite genders can be friends. Or is it specifically the thought of us two that’s causing you grief?”

“This would be so much easier if you would just agree to have sex with me,” grumbled Vala. “Why won’t you? Are you homosexual?”

“No!” yelped Cam. He coughed to cover his reaction. “No. I’m a big fan of the ladies. Big. Huge.”

“I’m afraid that I’ll have to see some proof before I believe the claims of your size.” Vala looked at him expectantly, with no trace of the impish grin that lurked beneath the surface. (Cam wasn’t the only one who could put on a blank face.)

Cam sighed and gazed heavenward for help. “Vala, I am not whipping it out for you, for carnal purposes or otherwise.”

“Is it because you don’t find me attractive? I have noticed you looking at my breasts, just so you know.”

“Far be it from me to offer a woman any kind of critique on the way she chooses to dress, but as Momma says, don’t put the goods in the front window if you don’t want people to stop and look. I’m a man. I will occasionally notice a woman’s, ah, bosom, especially one as nice as yours.”

“Ah-hah! So you do think I’m attractive!”

“That was never in doubt,” answered Cam. He cut her off as he continued: “But! That doesn’t necessarily mean I’m gonna sleep with you.”

“Oh, darling, there would be precious little sleeping involved, I assure you.”

Cam rolled his eyes and continued. “For one thing, I don’t do a lot of casual sex, especially with my co-workers. It’s a hell of thing to walk in Monday morning after a one-night stand and have to look that person in the face.”

“Do you have a problem with casual sex? Surely there have been women that you only wanted to fuck?” She waited for him to flinch at her casual use of the obscenity. (She had once idly asked Daniel why Cameron, unlike most of the other military members of the SGC, rarely used coarse language when she or Sam was within hearing range. He started into a long ramble about Southern gentility and codes of conduct that she tuned out almost immediately after his opening breath. When she later asked the same question of Sam, the answer was much more succinct: “Because his Momma would beat him if he did.” It answered her question, and much more besides, about Cameron.)

“Vala! We are not talking about my sex life.”

“It would certainly be a short conversation, from the very little of it you seem to be having.”

Cam sighed. “Fine. Whatever. Look, can we get back to the point, here?”

“Why you’re refusing my advances?”

“Why you don’t think we can be friends.”

“Perhaps I don’t trust a man who wants to have sex with me, but won’t.”

Startled, Cam blinked, thought a moment, and asked, “You don’t trust me?”

Under Cam’s scrutiny, Vala pulled her knees to her chest and rested her cheek against them. The move made her appear vulnerable and young, but the look in her eyes was an ageless, wounded wariness.

“Vala?”

“I don’t know, all right?” she snapped. “Everybody always wants something from me, and usually it’s my body, or sometimes just my head, but in any case, I know what they want! With you, and the team, I haven’t a clue. It’s as if --” She bit her lip before she said too much.

“As if what, darlin’?” Cam prompted gently.

She regarded him for a bit. Everything about his expression and body language was open and honest. He seemed perfectly willing to wait as long as necessary for her response. In an instant of pure clarity, she knew that if she got up right then and walked out, he wouldn’t stop her, but this moment would be lost. Not because he’d give up, but that she didn’t know if she could ever come this close again to revealing herself. His steady regard, the sense of waiting without judgment, a silent support that she instinctively knew she could depend upon, slipped right through her walls.

“As if you’re waiting for me to do something, either make a wrong step, or fulfill some task that, once finished, means my use to you is done. And then you’ll politely and firmly escort me to some backwater planet with a ‘Forever is too soon’ farewell, and I’ll be back where I started.” She sniffed, and realized with horror that it sounded suspiciously close to a sniffle. She would not cry in front of him – anything but tears. Crying (artfully controlled sobs that didn’t ruin her makeup or make her face unattractively splotchy) was a last-resort tool in her grab bag of talents. She’d be damned if she let him see the real thing.

She hadn’t counted on Cam sitting beside her and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. She looked away, furiously blinking at the wetness in her traitorous eyes. He produced a tissue from somewhere and offered it to her. She snatched it out of his hand and carefully dabbed at her eyes.

“Vala, I can’t speak to the others, but to me, you’re a valuable member of the team. You have the knowledge and skills to be a great asset to us. At least, when you feel like it.” Cam’s frustrated tone in the last statement prompted a brief smile from her. He continued: “You’re someone I would like to get to know better, with no strings attached, no expectations other than the obvious ‘don’t sell us out, and don’t get us killed’. A little less thieving and a little more honesty couldn’t hurt, either.” Vala’s grin was bigger this time. “If this is too much for you, and if you want to leave, that’s up to you, but I like having you around.”

“Daniel keeps threatening to sell me at the next offworld bazaar.” Her voice was thicker than she wanted, but steady.

Cam snorted. “In case you hadn’t noticed, he’s offered to drop me down the nearest well. Several times. Besides, you two seem to have your own issues, and I ain’t gettin' involved there.”

She uncurled her legs, and with a big sigh, dropped her head to rest on his shoulder. “I don’t know what I’m doing, Cameron.”

“Not a whole lot of us do. We make it up as we go along, and if we’re lucky, we’ve got friends to help on the way.”

She tipped her head to look at him critically. “That sounds very close to a platitude from one of your greeting cards.”

He grinned. “You got me. I’m a sentimental sap. I like puppies ‘n kittens ‘n cute babies, and I cry at sad movies.”

She crossly said, “No, you don’t. You and Sam proclaim that the heroine would feel better if she just beat up the man who did her wrong, while Daniel tries to pretend that he was watching instead of reading one of his journals and Teal’c pats me on my knee.”

“Sounds like a good group of friends to me.”

She allowed herself a wry grin. “I suppose.”

“So, are we OK here?” asked Cam.

Vala sighed. “I still think you’re wasting a perfectly good opportunity to ravish me. Here I am, all open and emotionally vulnerable…” She gazed up at him through long eyelashes. He gave her a warning look. She shrugged and laughed. “Can’t blame a girl for trying.” She considered him for a moment. “Friends, hm? I guess we could try that.”

Cam gave her a quick squeeze and stood up, offering her a hand. She took it and allowed him to pull her to her feet. On impulse, she threw her arms around him and whispered “Thank you” in his ear.

He replied, “Anything for a friend. Oh, and Vala?”

“Yes?” Her voice was somewhat muted from being smashed into his shoulder.

“Hands off my ass.”

She giggled and stepped away. “Sorry.”

“Are we going to need some guidelines on being pals?”

“Such as?”

“For starters, can you ease up on the all the sex walk and talk?” He gestured at her outfit.

She pouted. “What about flirting?”

“Flirting is fine. I like flirting. Groping, however, is unacceptable.”

“No touching at all? What about hugs and foot rubs?” she challenged.

“There’s a difference between friendly contact and assault. Just don’t touch anywhere where the skin never sees the sun.”

“With your habit of losing your pants, Cam, that’s not any kind of restriction.”

“Do I have to get a doll to show you the areas that are off limits?”

“Just testing the flirting rule.” She beamed. This new level of understanding was going to be a lot of fun. She was sure that bantering with Cam could cause Daniel to turn all-new shades of purple. And if somewhere down the line she gave up on the stubborn Dr. Jackson and decided to chase the handsome Lieutenant Colonel instead…well, that wouldn’t be all bad.

Checking out Cam’s answering smile, she thought to herself that this friendship was strange new territory, but one that was going to be quite enjoyable to explore.